The daily grind

All-day kindergarten is a grind. At least in the first few weeks/months. My little man breezed through the first week, then got a little balky in the second. Now, at the start of the third week, he's done with it.

"I don't want to go to school."

"It's too long."

"I'd much prefer to stay home with you, play with my Legos, and eat and drink anytime I so desire. That would be ideal. Kindergarten blows."

(I'm paraphrasing on that last one.)

He'll get through it, of course.

Homework

School is in just the second week here, but the avalanche of homework has already washed over us. Throw in soccer practice and a weekly piano lesson and there's not a lot of time for a kid to be a kid. Most of the homework falls into the category of 'drill and kill' in my opinion. The result, I'm afraid, will be a further loss of enthusiasm for school and school work. Not good. Plus, it puts the parent who happens to be home at the time, (in this case, me), in the position of taskmaster. A lose-lose situation.

The Baby Shower Gift

I'm very excited to say that I think the horrific ritual of the Jack and Jill baby shower has come and gone. I went to a couple and if that never happens again then I'll be the happier for it.

Even though I don't have to attend the blessed shower event I sometimes am asked to help with buying the baby shower gift. Additionally, as a result of writing the blog, we get asked occasionally what would be a unique gift to give(the unique part seems to be important to a lot of people). There are only three things I usually recommend:

1) The first is a sound machine. We have three boys and they are loud and the sound machine gives our youngest a chance to sleep uninterrupted. We take it on the road as well and it's not something given at baby showers too often.

2) The second is an umbrella stroller. This product is discussed in the previous post by that lousy n'er do well Gil Buckman. They're inexpensive, fun and important for people traveling, doing short trips etc.

3) Finally, my personal favorite, the Patemm Pad. We've written about this company and their products before (and one of our bloggers knows the founders through little league). They make natural, eco-friendly, round diaper changing pads. They hold a couple diapers, wipes and change of clothes, fold up nice and neat as a substitute for the big diaper bag on short trips. They are gold as a baby shower gift.

So, that's what we've got for you. If you want to forgo the dreaded diaper cake, which i think you should, enjoy these alternatives.

Stroller Mania

When our youngest was born (just shy of 11 years ago), strollers were, well, strollers. You maybe had two (as we did) -- one for everyday plus a jogger. This worked great, as the everyday stroller folded and fit into the back of the car.

[ It occurs to me that this is shaping up to sound like a lame standup comedy bit. Fair enough. But bear with me. ]

Without naming any (brand) names I will point at a certain brand that to me has pushed the stroller thing totally off the edge. Strollers are now HUGE, and if they do fold it takes a half hour, a set of instructions, and a nap. And did someone say cost? These things go for nearly A THOUSAND DOLLARS.

Ok so here's my take. I'll grant that a good jogging stroller is a must for many families. We certainly love ours (it's the same basic Baby Jogger model that we've had for 11 years). But for everyday? Give me a good old fashioned umbrella stroller. Here's my bulleted list of "why":

>You can get a pretty spiffy one for like $40, and cheapo ones for $20. The decent ones have enough storage underneath for a trip to the park or a small grocery bag, the cheapo ones less so but you can always hang a bag off of the handles.

>They fold up soooooo much easier, and take up a lot less room to boot (now that we have 3 kids we wouldn't even be able to fit one of the mammoth ones in the back w/ all our other junk). 

>Price. Kids stuff (especially stuff that gets folded and otherwise lugged around) is bound to show wear and tear pretty quickly. At between $20-$40 you don't have to sweat it nearly as much. In fact I remember more than one vacation where we didn't even pack a stroller and instead simply bought a cheap one once we arrived then left it behind.

>Manageability. Believe it or not umbrella strollers are actually easier to manage than more expensive ones. Tight corners at the grocery store, bumpy sidewalks, you name it. All easier w/ the cheaper solution.

Ok, if I sat and thought about it some more I know I could add to this list. But I'll stop here. So before you go out and spend a gajillion dollars on some bright orange tank of a thing, check the umbrella aisle. You'll thank me for it. 

Toys that are worth the dough

We don't do much product pushing here, but I was trying to pack away the Thomas the Tank Engine set recently when our oldest screamed that, even though he doesn't play with it anymore, it was critical that the set remain in the house. Made me think about what were the absolute best toy investments we've ever made. In true, Nick Hornby fashion, I'll go with a top five list:

#1 Thomas the Tank Engine
Pound-for-pound our best buy ever. One smart move we made was buying the real Thomas trains and then buying most of the track, knock-off, through Target, etc. More good play out of Thomas than any other toy we've ever bought. Don't, however, expect the younger boys in the family to automatically follow in the footsteps of the oldest in the family. We found Boy Number 2 played with it some and Number 3 almost not at all.

#2 Lego
Most people would put this number one. It's true that as the kids get older, Lego moves ahead of Thomas, particularly the Star Wars variety. In fact, there is a huge community of people on YouTube who actually film Lego Star Wars scenes. Most are suitable for kids viewing.

#3 Playmobil
We have a bunch of these different sets. Some castle/knight-based and some other themes. Good stuff.

#4 Blocks
Giant baskets of all kinds of block shapes are awesome. I don't even know what brands exist since we've gotten them as gifts, but buy the big solid brick-type blocks.

#5
Hot Wheels/Matchbox
Not all of our boys play/played with them, but this was pretty damn reliable across the board. You need to get track at some point to ratchet up the playability, but for the most part, a box of Hot Wheels means you've bought yourself at least a half-hour of playtime.

Ready for kindergarten

Our youngest starts kindergarten tomorrow. Another milestone. In trying to amp up his excitement (and overcome his nerves), we waited until Labor Day to go shopping for a backpack and lunchbox, ones that he could pick out himself and feel good about.

Perhaps we waited a little too long. Tried to avoid Target, but visits to three other stores yielded a cool camo backpack ("Dad, are soldiers good?") but no lunchbox. Hello, Target. (I have nothing against the store itself, and the lines aren't anywhere near as bad as they used to be; now I just hate the parking lot.) By Labor Day, their back-to-school section resembled Saigon after the fall. There were a few lunchboxes for girls, but my man wasn't interested in Hello Kitty. A fellow customer guided us to another aisle that contained three remaining Transformers lunchboxes. I didn't feel great about padding Michael Bay's retirement account, but beggars can't be choosers.

He's ready.

Tutu, Football Helmet, Ninja Sword

My middle child (let's call her Sadie, shall we?) is a hoot. Yeah I know everyone thinks their kids are high-larious, and some of them may even be right.

But I'm not talking about OTHER people's kids, I'm talking about mine. Sadie's older (by 2 years) brother is very athletic, and sports equipment of every type is pretty consistently scattered all over the place. Sadie never went through a heavy Barbie phase but does like to do things like play dress-up. 

[ Side note. Sadie was born very soon after my maternal grandmother passed away. Now I'm no Miss Cleo but I have always felt there was something to that connection. My grandmother was a skeptic in the very best way. Sizing up folks with a slight frown, basically assuming they were dolts and daring them to prove her wrong. Sadie shares this healthy skepticism, as well as my grandmaw's general "Oh yeah? And what of it?" attitude. ]

So cut to a scene from a few weeks ago. Sadie and her brother are both playing downstairs, relatively peacefully (read: no trips to the ER). All of a sudden we hear footsteps on the stairs, and there's Sadie in a (soon-to-be-favorite) get-up.

Frilly pink tutu.    New York Giants football helmet.    Giant plastic Ninja sword.

We were speechless at first. But I soon stammered out some sort of brilliance along the lines of "wow, that's quite an outfit sweetie."

Her response? She stares at me. Narrows her eyes a little bit. Turns on her heels and walks out of the room.

Rock on, Sadie. Rock on.  

The talk

Had a version of "the talk" with my oldest son this weekend. He's a pretty mature almost-ten year-old and was curious about things that his friends have been talking about.

It all started when he asked me what NC-17 meant, having seen the listing of film ratings in a movie theater. I explained that movies rated NC-17 contained scenes that are not appropriate for kids, usually extreme violence or (pause, lower voice) sexual content. He processed that, then said he had another question for me but would wait to ask when his little brother wasn't around. I knew what I was in for. My wife gave me the go-ahead to handle it, so later that evening, my son and I went for a walk.

Halfway up the block he asked, "So, what is sex?" I had done some reading and looked at some books on the subject (of talking to your kids about it) so I felt at least a little prepared. I started by asking him some questions about what his friends thought or knew about it. He said there was a group of his friends who would sometimes huddle together at recess and talk about it. (I found this interesting, because I know that at least three of the kids he mentioned have had some form of the talk with their parents.) He also brought up some YouTube searches done by one friend and some other general schoolyard chatter on the subject. Interestingly, it was clear to him that their knowledge of the subject was hazy at best.

In answering his question, I touched on puberty and how bodies change as we mature. He knew a bit about this, as he's developed a tiny bit of hair on his legs and upper lip. Then I brought up the differences between men's bodies and women's bodies. He's observant enough to have noticed this but didn't have any real understanding of the specifics. We talked about what certain body parts are for as they relate to human reproduction. I started as innocuously as I could with breasts. He knew this one -- milk. Then he asked me what testicles are for. I didn't have to go far before he figured out that they must produce/contain whatever men contribute to the process. We talked about eggs getting fertilized and splitting and growing inside the woman, etc. He took it all in and seemed to understand.

Which led to the big money question -- "But HOW" does the seed get to the egg? Treading carefully, I boiled it down this way -- "the body parts are made to fit together." I wasn't at all sure how I would answer any follow-up questions, but happily, this was enough for him at this point in his life.

We concluded with my suggestion that he keep his newly acquired knowledge to himself, as this is the kind of thing that parents should be responsible for telling their own kids. He concurred.

And so, a milepost of parenthood. I felt quite good about how I handled it. Now I can only hope that in a few more years he doesn't find himself a hormonal wild man like I remember being.